literature

In Her Arms

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Literature Text

Arden Grail shivered despite the warmth of the Dxun jungle. A morning mist hung in the air, and a light rain fell from the sky. She walked along familiar paths, watching the visions that floated in and out of existence about her. She was frightened to look at the ground, lest she see bodies littering the jungle floor again. Bodies from long ago. If she closed her eyes, she could imagine that there was blood mingled with the water that squelched beneath her bare feet.

Opening her eyes again, she thought she could see a troop of soldiers disappearing into the brush to her left. She imagined a group of Mandalorians hidden in the foliage, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. Some said that Dxun looked exactly the same, no matter where on the moon you were, but Arden recognized this place. She knew exactly where she was. Quickening her pace, she approached the base of a large cliff, its rocky surface darkened by the rain. It looked just as it had when she last laid eyes on it.

She walked the length of the cliff, stopping when she came to an outcropping of rock, just where she remembered it being. She knelt down beside it and closed her eyes. The rain fell harder now, as though the moon itself wished to recreate for her the memory she wished to see again. The only thing missing to complete the experience was the gunfire all about. Her mind conjured the sounds of battle for her, just as it had been so long ago. For just a moment she could see it all again.

She could see the young soldier cradled in her arms, his blood pouring freely and staining her armor. Life was leaving his terrified face, despite her best efforts. His hand gripped her shoulder for comfort, and his eyes begged her to save him. One of her hands hovered over the gaping wound in his stomach, glowing softly. She poured every ounce of her ability into that wound, trying to seal it. She could feel him growing fainter through the Force, and she pushed herself even harder. Finally, she felt the life leave him, and he fell limp in her arms, his hand slipping from her shoulder.

She could see his face, completely still, his chest no longer taking in breath. Through a haze of tears, she reached out to close his lifeless eyes. She thought of the family and friends that he must have, and how he would never see them again. Her shoulders shook with silent sobs, as she looked into the face of the first man to die in her arms. He had been the first, but he would not be the last before the Wars ended. A hand touched her shoulder.

"You alright?" Atton asked. The young soldier disappeared, and she was dressed in her own clothes again, unstained by the young man's blood. For a minute, she knelt there, not saying a word. She took comfort from the pilot's hand, as she allowed the memory to wash over her again. She could not forget what had happened here, for doing so would be a betrayal. She could never forget the faces of any of the men who had died following her orders; died because of her. Finally, she turned her head to look at him.

"I will be." She said, quietly. He removed his hand, and offered it to her. She took it, and stood. Together, they walked back to the Ebon Hawk, neither speaking of what had just occurred.

~~

Arden shook as she held him in her arms. It wasn't supposed to end this way. He wasn't supposed to be here. He had tried to protect her, and now he was dying. She was the reason that he was dying, just as she had been for the deaths of the men she had led in the Wars. He was dying for her because she hadn't been fast enough; because she wasn't strong enough. She tried to heal him, tried to pull him away from the brink, but his wounds were many. The stump of what was left of his arm, the deep cuts, and the burns were overcoming him.

He coughed, and blood came with it. This wasn't supposed to happen! She thought, as a tear escaped her eye. She was putting all that she had into saving him, but it would not be enough; it had never been enough. Just as he reached the edge of his life, he reached his hand up, to touch her face. He whispered his last goodbye, and was gone, his eyes still staring into hers. Tears poured down her face, as she held his body to her. It wasn't supposed to happen again. Not to him.

Another man had died in her arms, and like the others it was all her fault. She held him, and wept.
Well. . . this did not turn out at all how I thought it would. Anyway, I got the idea of Arden, the Exile, walking through Dxun thinking about past battles. It was about halfway through that I realized I would have to add the scene with Atton dying.

It's funny, I never wrote that scene because I'd wanted to make sure I could do it justice when I did, but now I write in on the spur of the moment, and had to cut out all of his wonderful lines! They just wouldn't have fit. :(

Anyway, I'm a bit depressed now. And yes, I should have been working on NaNoWriMo, not this. XD

Edit
Just realized this is the first time I've written about my Exile. Unless you count her brief appearance in The Many Faces of Revan. I don't. XD Oh, and apparently she goes barefoot a lot. . .

Atton Rand belongs to Obsidian
Arden Grail belongs to me
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KalmaStari's avatar
Whoa. This had some emotional punch all right!

The comparison between Atton and the random soldier was very chilling. :no:

Well done!